Success Connections

January Success Resources

Just a few more resources to add to your toolbox.

The January issue of the newsletter, Relating@Work is out and can be viewed here.
If you'd like to subscribe, the signup page is on the left hand side of my website.

How To Use Google To Get Better Search Results - You'd be surprised to know how many calls I get each week from people who can't find what they're looking for on the internet. While some people think I'm a genius, I always give credit where credit is do.  In my book Google knows everything, but you've
got to know how to search it.  The Googlers have created a guide for you.  Find this little gem right here.

A Big List Of Sites That Teach You How To Do Stuff - One Sunday afternoon I accidently ran a spoon through my garbage disposal. As I sat fretting about what it was going to cost me to get it fixed
the light bulb went off in my head.  Sure enough, Google helped me get the  disposal up and running in a matter of minutes.  The Read Write Web has compiled a huge list of sites that teach you how to do stuff.  Check it out here.

236 Open Courseware Collections, Podcasts and Videos - The Online Education Database has created a treasure chest of complimentary training.  While you don't get credit for taking these classes, you
get to train your brain for free.  Check them out here.

Share your favorite resources with us here!

Be Conscious Of Who You're Being

Last month’s article titled, “I Promise Myself”, suggested that you add a new dimension to your list of intentions for the new year.  We briefly covered some thoughts on defining “who” you want to be for the next year.  But it wasn’t until I started working through the process myself that I realized just how significantly this could impact my overall results.  Of course, my “aha” moment was followed with an immediate “duh” moment…”Why haven’t I done this before now?”

That’s what prompted me to elaborate a little bit more on it this month.  I also created a nifty little tool to help you narrow down your “being” intentions for the year.

The “aha” Moment

After several hours of envisioning the upcoming year and recording my goals and intentions, I stepped back to look at where I was headed.  That’s when it struck me.  None of it could be accomplished on my own.  I realized that in order to do what I wanted to do, and get what I wanted to have, I needed the help, support, and cooperation of other people…relationships.  And that’s where the significance of “who you’re being” comes in. 

Let’s look at “being more honest” as an example of a “being” intention you might choose to focus on.

In “People Styles At Work”, Robert and Dorothy Bolton say that honest people consistently do three things:

• They refuse to make misleading statements.
• They do not withhold important information.
• They are truly genuine.

For us, that might be defined as:

• Saying no to commitments with acquaintances that you don’t intend to keep.
• Initiating a difficult conversation with an employee who is not meeting your needs.
• Telling your mother that she has caught you at a bad time (when she has), and asking if you can chat at another time.

Based on how we’ve defined it here, “being more honest” doesn’t sound so difficult.  Then why do we avoid it?  Two primary reasons, in my opinion.  First, we tend to take the unconscious path of least resistance…the easy way out.  Secondly, we haven’t made it a priority.

So, let’s say we choose “being more honest” as an area of focus this year.  How might that be valuable?  It’s respectful, both of others and our self.  Respect builds trust.  And trust is at the heart of every great relationship.  Now that is an accomplishment to celebrate at the end of the year!

If you decide that it’s worthwhile to identify your “being” intentions for the year, download the “Who Do You Want To Be” file from my website and print it out.  Just click on the file name.

1. Think in terms of “be more” or “be less” as you review the list. 
2. Circle the things you’d like to focus on this year.
3. Keep narrowing down your list until you settle on 1 – 3 areas of focus.
4. Write each of your intentions at the top of separate pieces of paper.
5. Now, write definitions for each of your intentions.  (see the honesty example above)
6. And finally, make your intentions visible.  You can put them on post-it notes, index cards, on a desktop screen saver, or even write them on your bathroom mirror.  Just keep them visible as reminders.

When it comes to relating to the important people in our lives, who we are being, often matters more that what we are doing.

What do you say?  Who will you focus on being this year?